Jamestown has once again proven that big things can come from simple beginnings, like when Bill Taylor (aka English Bill) used the term Jimbilly in a passing comment on the town board. People scratched their heads in confusion. What’s that they pondered? But soon, obliging citizens came forth with the official definitions.
You might be a Jimbilly if . . .
you check the QT before your commute.
you can speak with authority on the seating in a CH-47 helicopter
someone asks you where you live and you can’t quite figure out the answer.
you know people named Dreadlock, Rainbow, Barefoot, Oak or Rabbit.
you come home from the recycle center with more than you went with.
you think “happiness is two cords of oak blocks”.
you recognize the sound of a trackhoe and don’t even look up as one creeps past your house.
your vehicle is full of water containers and you’re wearing a little beige fleece hat or striped gloves.
You might be a female Jimbilly if your underwear says “You are a Goddess!”
you plead with Rainbow for more biscuits and gravy.
this is how you eat pie . . .
your public library looks like this . . .
your sunday afternoon looks like this . . .
you do your Christmas shopping on Dumpster Day . . .
you know the shortest, safest route to your house is to … start in the wrong direction, drive up a narrow unfamiliar canyon, onto a treacherous, windy, icy, high elevation highway, then down 2500 feet over washboards and steep switchbacks.
you know that Elliot’s Pitch was not the winning throw in the fourth game of the World Series.
you have recurring bouts of floodbrain.
you spend your grocery money on primo tires…twice a year!
the reason that you lock your car is to keep the bears out.
after two hours in Boulder you start to get anxiety attacks.
you are considering turning your cistern into a rental property once water service is restored in town.
your curtains are actually blankets!
your floors are insulated with dirt and dog hair!
your idea of a campfire is an enormous burning 430lb. pumpkin!
your food trash is kept in your freezer!
you cant see thru the ice on your windows in the house
you know what a goat path is.
you know that an east bound car and west bound car can make a traffic jam.
the sight of a Mountain Lion fills your heart with peace and wonder.
you remember people by the name of their dog.
one of your usernames is “Shack Dweller”.
you have memorized your FEMA number.
you enjoy spontaneous musical sessions with Jimbilly friends.
you played jungle golf at Suzie and Joe’s house, and enjoyed the cedar hot tub afterwards!
And so that people not forget about this rare species, Snake Habenero and Annamaria are working on bumper stickers.
Proud to be…..Jimbilly!
Have you hugged a jimbilly ttoday?
I was abducted by jimbillies.
jimbillies do it at the Merc.
Where the Hell is Jimtown?
I luv Dumpsterdaze.
Will trade Au for H2O.